Not All There

I’m spending this whole week with my best friend Christine while my boyfriend is suffering through Hell Week in Coronado.  I’ve noticed that since I came down to San Diego on Sunday night that each day I feel more and more out of it.  I cannot focus or concentrate because all I keep thinking about is J and if he is okay (which I know he is and I know he is going to pass Hell week, I have absolutely nothing to worry about, yet I cannot stop worrying).  Christine has been nice enough to deal with me this way.  She will start to ask me a question and she will have to repeat it several times before I can actually comprehend what she is saying.  This has only happened to me once before and that was the first week I found out that J was actually leaving for Navy Seal training. 

Christine and I had met with a director late one night to talk about filming a 45-minute feature with him filming in Los Angels.  I had quickly read the script before we had left to meet him and I read it out loud so Christine, who was making us dinner, could hear it as well.  While reading it I was picturing how everything was going to go, etc. When we met him, we had a few questions for him about the script, but for some reason, I was getting confused and I could not comprehend what he was telling us about the script, instead I just kept getting confused – I was not my normal self.

Yesterday Christine and I went to meet her aunt and on the way we stopped at Starbucks to get some breakfast.  I had no clue what I wanted (normally that is no problem for me), and once I did order, what I got was not satisfying for me.  Everything I have eaten this whole week has not been anything but food to fill my stomach, in fact barely any food, because I have lost my appetite and have had a hard time sleeping.  Once we got to her aunts house we left to go to the chiropractor (Christine takes care of her aunt a lot; drives her around, helps her shop, etc.).  My back has been killing me lately and I think it is out of alignment.  At the chiropractor, Christine and her aunt got adjusted and Christine being the amazing friend she is, tells them I need one too (but I was not going to say anything because I do not have a whole lot of extra cash right now).  They were kind enough to adjust me as well and her aunt paid for it, how sweet.  On the way back to her aunt’s house, we stopped at Subway; again, I did not want anything to eat.  I waited outside as Christine and her aunt ordered lunch.  I felt bad that I was not hanging out with them, but I felt like a zombie – just out of it.

After dropping off her aunt, we left to get a Brazilian wax.  The salon we went to had only one person waxing. While we were getting our Brazilian waxes she was telling us horror stories of patients she had – it made the whole waxing process easier, because we were laughing the whole time.  I am normally a person who does not like people in the room with me when I get waxed, but again, I was so out of it that I honestly did not care, plus it was my best friend and she was getting it done too.

Once we got back to her place, we both took a nap, neither of us sleeping well the night before.  An hour later, we got up to go eat at Pat and Oscars before heading to see “The Ugly Truth”.  At Pat and Oscars, we were both so out of it – it was ridiculous.  I am not sure if it was because we were both still tired from the nap, or the heat from outside.  We ordered a small salad that we shared and then a half order of breadsticks.  Neither of us could finish the salad or breadsticks.  I love Pat and Oscars and I could barely eat.  This whole J and his Hell Week thing have made me lose my appetite for even the foods that I absolutely love, sad.

Luckily we were going to go watch a comedy, so I was hoping that would help my mind get away from J for at least an hour and a half. Half way through the movie, my phone rang and it was a San Diego phone number (my phone was on silent, but I saw it light up in my purse, which do not worry, it did not distract any movie goers).  I immediately started to worry that someone from J’s class or someone from Coronado was calling me to tell me J was hurt.  I ignored the call and tried to keep watching the movie.  Once it was over, the first thing I did was check my messages – not J, everything was okay.

Back to Christine’s – I still had to work a bit before hitting the sack and trying to sleep.